For the first time since 1929, a new motorcycle has rolled out of the Phantom Motorcycle Manufacturing works. The new machine, dubbed the Phantom EG will be publicly displayed for the first time on May 23rd and 24th, 2009 at the International Custom Bike Show at London's Earls Court Exhibition Centre. You may learn more about the company and the machine at The Phantom Manufacturing Co., producer of quality sporting auto cycles for discerning gentlemen or follow up to the minute on Twitter @EThump. We look forward to hearing from you!
A New Phantom Has Arrived
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3,874 Posts
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11,481 Posts
There'll NEVER be another fighter like the F4..........
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7,113 Posts
I'm no gentleman, but I discern this is horse pucky.
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11,481 Posts
I notice Erasmus' Avatatar-man to be wearing a Mind Control Helmet.
I predict brisk sales of Aluminium Foil Futures.........
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8,714 Posts
I fear he may be nothing but a dupe for the notorious Count Al B. Sickalloverya.....!
Apologies and a change ...
Gentlemen,
First off, my apologies if my post was seen as nothing more than a ruse to make people go to places to which they do not wish. I am a strong believer in the will of man and doubt that such strong willed folk as yourselves could be wooed into doing something against your will. We simply wish to let people know that we have returned...from the beyond as it were. We have been instructed by our venerable secretary, Mrs. Ramsbottom, that the interweb or whatever you call this thing, is the way in which humans now do this. Long gone are the days of the penny post I suppose....<sigh>. Anyway, my apologies if my previous post proved to be too distracting or otherwise some sort of block in the normal flow of conversation. I will endeavour not to further aggravate you with such things.
For those of you interested in the goings on here at the Phantom works, then let me also pass on the sad information that the show where we had hoped to publicly display our handiwork has been canceled. So we are thinking of how we might still present our work to an interested public. I hope that I will not offend if I bring any updated information regarding this issue to this august panel. We are thinking of publishing some advance photos on our website in the next three weeks and here of course too if we can figure out how such a thing might be done.
As for Spagthorpe...such a tragic tale. Personally, I thought the man a genius at first. But then, as is frequently the case in the high born, tragedy seems to shadow such figures. I believe his engineering prowess began its decline with his dogged exploration of square wheels for off-road conveyances. He believed there was a certain pattern of protrusion and depression in nature's surfaces and that if the wheel was of the correct dimensions it could pass over the high bits and land the corners in the low bits thus resulting in a smooth ride. Nature proved a bit more chaotic and uncooperative and I do not believe old Spagthorpe ever forgave mother nature for her insolence.
Tally Ho!
Gentlemen,
First off, my apologies if my post was seen as nothing more than a ruse to make people go to places to which they do not wish. I am a strong believer in the will of man and doubt that such strong willed folk as yourselves could be wooed into doing something against your will. We simply wish to let people know that we have returned...from the beyond as it were. We have been instructed by our venerable secretary, Mrs. Ramsbottom, that the interweb or whatever you call this thing, is the way in which humans now do this. Long gone are the days of the penny post I suppose....<sigh>. Anyway, my apologies if my previous post proved to be too distracting or otherwise some sort of block in the normal flow of conversation. I will endeavour not to further aggravate you with such things.
For those of you interested in the goings on here at the Phantom works, then let me also pass on the sad information that the show where we had hoped to publicly display our handiwork has been canceled. So we are thinking of how we might still present our work to an interested public. I hope that I will not offend if I bring any updated information regarding this issue to this august panel. We are thinking of publishing some advance photos on our website in the next three weeks and here of course too if we can figure out how such a thing might be done.
As for Spagthorpe...such a tragic tale. Personally, I thought the man a genius at first. But then, as is frequently the case in the high born, tragedy seems to shadow such figures. I believe his engineering prowess began its decline with his dogged exploration of square wheels for off-road conveyances. He believed there was a certain pattern of protrusion and depression in nature's surfaces and that if the wheel was of the correct dimensions it could pass over the high bits and land the corners in the low bits thus resulting in a smooth ride. Nature proved a bit more chaotic and uncooperative and I do not believe old Spagthorpe ever forgave mother nature for her insolence.
Tally Ho!
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17,448 Posts
You may be able to post things here for free but, trust me on this, this gang of reprobates will make you pay somehow.
Many Thanks...
Gentlemen,
Many thanks for your kind welcome and allowing me to attune myself to your etiquette. My manners and customs are bit out of tune it seems with the times. Your patience with me is truly appreciated.
I must say I am aghast at the encyclopaedic knowledge that seems to reside in the collective mind of this community. And I am filled with joy to see the level of openness you all have with one another in sharing experiences -- bravo!
In my experience little was shared. My father once told me that discovery brings people together and invention tears them apart. I believe that he equated invention with commercial exploitation of discovery. We at Phantom learned how true his words were back in 1925.
After creating our unique "Sneezer" fuel atomiser, we showed it on our latest machine at the Bognor Festival of Machinery. Little did we know that two of our competitors were there and they made very close inspections of the device whilst we were exploring the ice lolly stand opposite run by a rather buxom lass named Nell...I digress.
Within weeks other manufacturers began displaying copies of the "Sneezer" claiming it as their own. We moved quickly to patent the device but the cat was out of the bag as they say. In the end we only sought British patents (due to high legal costs) for our other inventions such as our "Double Clamper" braking system and our "Bladraulic" steering and suspension system.
In the end we decided to put our limited resources directly into the machines we produce rather than into the pockets of lawyers wherever possible. In the end I believe it was the right decision as we have always been able to maintain a level of quality and attention to detail and distinctiveness -- the hallmarks of a gentleman's mount -- and survive..in a fashion.
We are seeking an alternative venue for sharing our new machine with the public and will surely let you all know when we do. In the meantime, best wishes to you all!
Tally Ho!
Gentlemen,
Many thanks for your kind welcome and allowing me to attune myself to your etiquette. My manners and customs are bit out of tune it seems with the times. Your patience with me is truly appreciated.
I must say I am aghast at the encyclopaedic knowledge that seems to reside in the collective mind of this community. And I am filled with joy to see the level of openness you all have with one another in sharing experiences -- bravo!
In my experience little was shared. My father once told me that discovery brings people together and invention tears them apart. I believe that he equated invention with commercial exploitation of discovery. We at Phantom learned how true his words were back in 1925.
After creating our unique "Sneezer" fuel atomiser, we showed it on our latest machine at the Bognor Festival of Machinery. Little did we know that two of our competitors were there and they made very close inspections of the device whilst we were exploring the ice lolly stand opposite run by a rather buxom lass named Nell...I digress.
Within weeks other manufacturers began displaying copies of the "Sneezer" claiming it as their own. We moved quickly to patent the device but the cat was out of the bag as they say. In the end we only sought British patents (due to high legal costs) for our other inventions such as our "Double Clamper" braking system and our "Bladraulic" steering and suspension system.
In the end we decided to put our limited resources directly into the machines we produce rather than into the pockets of lawyers wherever possible. In the end I believe it was the right decision as we have always been able to maintain a level of quality and attention to detail and distinctiveness -- the hallmarks of a gentleman's mount -- and survive..in a fashion.
We are seeking an alternative venue for sharing our new machine with the public and will surely let you all know when we do. In the meantime, best wishes to you all!
Tally Ho!
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8,714 Posts
Kind Sir, I'm sorry, chronic inhalation of Aviation grade fuel at an early age has addled my former ship mates brain...... less gunpowder in the starter is the obvious solution as the intent is to merely spin the motor, not launch it into flight sans the rest of the bike.
As a Disabled Veteran we make alowances for our Comrade in Arms as any right-thinking organization would. I trust Sir that you will also extend your indulgence, perhaps humoring him in his endeavors........
As a Disabled Veteran we make alowances for our Comrade in Arms as any right-thinking organization would. I trust Sir that you will also extend your indulgence, perhaps humoring him in his endeavors........
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5,447 Posts
The right honorable steam pipe fitter has his opinions and I have mine. While I might have been exposed to the somewhat adeling effects of 115/145 avgas on occasion, it is still my firm belief, nay my extreme right and duty as a subject of the Crown to explore and dwelve into the somewhat mundane obsession with pinwheel start mechanisms and such. If you will pardon me Sir!
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8,714 Posts
By all means Sir, do continue.. your knowledge in these matters is beyond dispute.. (wink wink nudge nudge) more gunpowder it is!!
I'll just wait over here behind this rather formidable stone ediface while you give her a test fire shall I?......
I'll just wait over here behind this rather formidable stone ediface while you give her a test fire shall I?......
Ahh, the Twizzler
After the FH, the Twizzler was my favourite... the development of the incendiary starting mechanism, (which was later developed further and used on the Canberra aircraft) was one example of a great idea that we just didn't have the luxury of time or resources to fully develop.
We at Phantom have never shied away from the potential risks associated with inflammable compounds or incindiary device. I would in fact go so far as to say we all had quite a soft spot for things that burned. Why else would we be so excited about the methanol reactor or the internal combustion engine?
Our common practice, when testing model prototype is to have Titus prepare the machine and have Enoch ride it. Titus, though a bit of a rough character to some, was a diligent spanner man of the highest caliber. And Enoch had a penchant and skill for speed that was unequaled amongst our firm.
It is interesting that you suggest a "robust" charge be applied to the starting mechanism to get the motor to "turn over". This was our thinking exactly. We purchased a variety of pinwheels and rocket devices from the Chinese Market in Liverpool. Sadly, the seller spoke little of The King's English so communication was strained to put it mildly. Regardless, we had a good sample of various devices to test.
As was usual with us, Titus rolled out the Twizzler 01 and attached what he felt would be an adequate charge to start the motor. He tickled and set the levels of fuel and air in the "Sneezer" and set fire to the short fuse attached to the two-rocket pinwheel starting mechanism. Almost immediately the device ignited and emitted a loud howl, a cloud of white smoke, and a shower of sparks that engulfed poor Titus in the wink of an eye. We then heard, from the heart of the cloud, a series of bangs, a scream, and the motor of the Twizzler running at high speed and then .....silence. The smoke cleared and we saw Titus flat out on his back with the entire front of his coverall burnt off his body, exposing his undergarments, and all the hair from his face and the front of his bonce completely singed off. At his foot, or rather on it, was resting the upside-down and charred remains of the Twizzler.
Apparently Titus had underestimated the power of his selected rockets. Upon lighting the fuse, which was far too short, the rocket turned an inch and then locked and proceeded to launch the entire machine off the ground. It hit Titus in the face and knocked him on his back and ignited his coverall in one swift motion as Titus was permanently covered in some for or another of lubricant. Titus claims he saw The Twizzler perform a complete loop avbove him and the engine starting before crashing down on his left foot -- hence the scream.
After a few subsequent tests we found that a slightly smaller rocket attached to a metal plate was sufficient to start the motor. but the system demanded the rider to stand by with a water supply as it was necessary to douse the rocket as soon as the motor had started. Our solicitor warned us of possible legal issues arising from requiring our customers to carry incendiary devices on them whenever using our product.
About that time we devised a means of manually regulating spark timing such that "kick" starting became a practical possibility. the starting procedure reverted to one similar to our earliest machines with kicking replacing running. It was mildly labour saving but not by much. We determined that autocycle was destined to be a young man's pursuit anyway so we stuck with that approach.
We understand that most other manufacturers now employ electrically powered starting motors so that older and more sedentary gentlemen may still partake of the pleasures of riding and we salute them. But I fear that we are perhaps too stuck in our ways to entertain such complexity in our machines. But we shall see what time tells..
Cheerio!
After the FH, the Twizzler was my favourite... the development of the incendiary starting mechanism, (which was later developed further and used on the Canberra aircraft) was one example of a great idea that we just didn't have the luxury of time or resources to fully develop.
We at Phantom have never shied away from the potential risks associated with inflammable compounds or incindiary device. I would in fact go so far as to say we all had quite a soft spot for things that burned. Why else would we be so excited about the methanol reactor or the internal combustion engine?
Our common practice, when testing model prototype is to have Titus prepare the machine and have Enoch ride it. Titus, though a bit of a rough character to some, was a diligent spanner man of the highest caliber. And Enoch had a penchant and skill for speed that was unequaled amongst our firm.
It is interesting that you suggest a "robust" charge be applied to the starting mechanism to get the motor to "turn over". This was our thinking exactly. We purchased a variety of pinwheels and rocket devices from the Chinese Market in Liverpool. Sadly, the seller spoke little of The King's English so communication was strained to put it mildly. Regardless, we had a good sample of various devices to test.
As was usual with us, Titus rolled out the Twizzler 01 and attached what he felt would be an adequate charge to start the motor. He tickled and set the levels of fuel and air in the "Sneezer" and set fire to the short fuse attached to the two-rocket pinwheel starting mechanism. Almost immediately the device ignited and emitted a loud howl, a cloud of white smoke, and a shower of sparks that engulfed poor Titus in the wink of an eye. We then heard, from the heart of the cloud, a series of bangs, a scream, and the motor of the Twizzler running at high speed and then .....silence. The smoke cleared and we saw Titus flat out on his back with the entire front of his coverall burnt off his body, exposing his undergarments, and all the hair from his face and the front of his bonce completely singed off. At his foot, or rather on it, was resting the upside-down and charred remains of the Twizzler.
Apparently Titus had underestimated the power of his selected rockets. Upon lighting the fuse, which was far too short, the rocket turned an inch and then locked and proceeded to launch the entire machine off the ground. It hit Titus in the face and knocked him on his back and ignited his coverall in one swift motion as Titus was permanently covered in some for or another of lubricant. Titus claims he saw The Twizzler perform a complete loop avbove him and the engine starting before crashing down on his left foot -- hence the scream.
After a few subsequent tests we found that a slightly smaller rocket attached to a metal plate was sufficient to start the motor. but the system demanded the rider to stand by with a water supply as it was necessary to douse the rocket as soon as the motor had started. Our solicitor warned us of possible legal issues arising from requiring our customers to carry incendiary devices on them whenever using our product.
About that time we devised a means of manually regulating spark timing such that "kick" starting became a practical possibility. the starting procedure reverted to one similar to our earliest machines with kicking replacing running. It was mildly labour saving but not by much. We determined that autocycle was destined to be a young man's pursuit anyway so we stuck with that approach.
We understand that most other manufacturers now employ electrically powered starting motors so that older and more sedentary gentlemen may still partake of the pleasures of riding and we salute them. But I fear that we are perhaps too stuck in our ways to entertain such complexity in our machines. But we shall see what time tells..
Cheerio!
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