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· The Toad
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The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
 

· Aging Cafe` Racer
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Chuck Norris can round house kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting everyone, everywhere in the face, at any time
 

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On the set of Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard.

As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to life. Chuck Norris then roundhouse kicked it, killing it instantly. This was just to prove that the good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.
 

· Aging Cafe` Racer
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Chuck Norris doesn't have sex with men because he's gay...Chuck Norris has sex with men because he ran out of women
 

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Maybe he was trying to commit suicide by deer and failed. Then figured he might as well shot himself instead.

Kinda like the guy in Texas that shot himself "accidentally" twice with a bolt-action rifle.
 

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Maybe he was trying to commit suicide by deer and failed. Then figured he might as well shot himself instead.

Kinda like the guy in Texas that shot himself "accidentally" twice with a bolt-action rifle.
"....cause of Death was a shotgun-blast to the base of the skull: LAPD has ruled it as a "Suicide"...."
 

· Aging Cafe` Racer
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"....cause of Death was a shotgun-blast to the base of the skull: LAPD has ruled it as a "Suicide"...."
Well yeah....I mean if you're going to check out then shooting yourself in the back of the head with a shotgun should do the trick.....
 

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