Thank You, God!
For such fertile satirical raw materiel. I tell ya, you can't make up stuff this good.
First off, if you've ever been to New Mexico, you should it's very difficult to detect any sort of higher brain function in anybody there. That "brain death" thing would be a really tough call in Albequrque, for instance.
But seriously, maybe this will lead to a subdivision of which organs are farmed from the riders of the various motorcycle brands? For instance, if the rider was on a Harley Davidson, you are reasonably certain that you don't want any brain or liver tissue from this donor.
On the other hand, I have a cousin who has a rapidly deteriorating sense of smug self-satisfaction. The first BMW or SV650 owner that gets it will doubtlessly have not died in vain, as my cousin will have the needed organ packed in dry ice, flown across the country, and transplanted into his body so he can once again feel superior about his consumer product choices just like any other healthy American man.
There is a 63-year-old woman in Grosse Point, Michigan who has not clipped a coupon, shopped at Target, or taken extra packets of Sweet-n-lo from her Starbucks for years, due to a battle with thrift-organ cancer that required a partial thriftectomy. The next noble victim who dies unhelmeted in New Mexico, while riding his KLR650 or GS500E will give up his massive, overdeveloped thrift organ so Mrs. Dunleavy may once again annoy her family members with tales of how she saved 50 cents on her purchase of Cool-Whip dessert topping.
And then there is Hakim Schwartz, of Portland, Oregon, who suffers from small testes syndrome, rendering him unable to father children. The next TL1000S rider who tank-slaps himself into oblivion will make sure the Schwartz household will one day resound with the sound of tiny feet.
Rachael Morris of Freemantle, Nebraska is obsessively frugal, unable to enjoy even going to diner at Wendy's and renting a $1 DVD at Blockbuster. But thanks to the new law, as soon as a Ducati owner buys il farmo, (doubtlessly when his $3,000 Marchesisni mags disintegrate at 110 mph) a partial money-wasting organ transplant will enable her to enjoy life and eat out more often.
Senator Hurt's bill will open so many doors to those Americans suffering needlessly. It's not a moment too soon.
For such fertile satirical raw materiel. I tell ya, you can't make up stuff this good.
First off, if you've ever been to New Mexico, you should it's very difficult to detect any sort of higher brain function in anybody there. That "brain death" thing would be a really tough call in Albequrque, for instance.
But seriously, maybe this will lead to a subdivision of which organs are farmed from the riders of the various motorcycle brands? For instance, if the rider was on a Harley Davidson, you are reasonably certain that you don't want any brain or liver tissue from this donor.
On the other hand, I have a cousin who has a rapidly deteriorating sense of smug self-satisfaction. The first BMW or SV650 owner that gets it will doubtlessly have not died in vain, as my cousin will have the needed organ packed in dry ice, flown across the country, and transplanted into his body so he can once again feel superior about his consumer product choices just like any other healthy American man.
There is a 63-year-old woman in Grosse Point, Michigan who has not clipped a coupon, shopped at Target, or taken extra packets of Sweet-n-lo from her Starbucks for years, due to a battle with thrift-organ cancer that required a partial thriftectomy. The next noble victim who dies unhelmeted in New Mexico, while riding his KLR650 or GS500E will give up his massive, overdeveloped thrift organ so Mrs. Dunleavy may once again annoy her family members with tales of how she saved 50 cents on her purchase of Cool-Whip dessert topping.
And then there is Hakim Schwartz, of Portland, Oregon, who suffers from small testes syndrome, rendering him unable to father children. The next TL1000S rider who tank-slaps himself into oblivion will make sure the Schwartz household will one day resound with the sound of tiny feet.
Rachael Morris of Freemantle, Nebraska is obsessively frugal, unable to enjoy even going to diner at Wendy's and renting a $1 DVD at Blockbuster. But thanks to the new law, as soon as a Ducati owner buys il farmo, (doubtlessly when his $3,000 Marchesisni mags disintegrate at 110 mph) a partial money-wasting organ transplant will enable her to enjoy life and eat out more often.
Senator Hurt's bill will open so many doors to those Americans suffering needlessly. It's not a moment too soon.
